No bake breakfast bars

I got an apology today. From a German Doctor. Mays birth was wrapped with so many emotions. Joy, relief, love but unfortunately there was also fear, abandonment, hurt and worry. The short version is that we were let down by a host of medical staff, from the doctor that admitted me, to the nurses on duty that day. The thing is that everyone is human, we all have bad days, we all have days when we are rushed and tired and stressed, and I can only imagine that in the medical profession all of those things are a million times harder and more serious. But two things happened last week. Firstly I was reading about birth and the author wrote that in birth, despite what traumas may happen, most of us think ‘at least I have a healthy baby’ but, she wrote, you matter too. Secondly I realised that I wasn’t ok with it. This seems so obvious to say but often we are not ok with something and yet we settle for it, or we quash it beneath a flurry of other feelings. Last week I realised that I wasn’t ok with what happened and that I wanted my chance to talk about it and my chance to get an apology that I feel I deserve. That day was supposed to be a magical one. I had no expectations going into it, I was willing and ready to listen and learn from the experienced medical team. I deserved to enjoy it, to feel cared for and accepted, loved and respected. I deserved to feel special because I had just given birth to an amazing baby girl. I had become a mum and I needed a little love for it.

So today, I got on the bike and cycled through the snow. I had a range of tests and then I sat opposite the Dr that delivered May and told her exactly how those 48hrs were for me. She sat, she listened and then she held my arm and apologised. She offered me support, she wrote complaints but most of all she validated that what happened wasn’t ok. And now of course it all feels a lot better.

So I am sitting here, writing this and drinking coffee. The baby is sleeping after a morning at nursery, the husband is running errands. There is an apple cake baking in the oven and a cauldron of ratatouille on the stove to drop round at a friends house. My eyes are burning with tiredness, emotional rather than physical, and i am eating the last of these breakfast bars. These bars have lasted 2 weeks in the freezer and they are amazing. They are the best grab and go bar I have ever made and I love that you keep them frozen but that they are ready to eat within 5 minutes. You dont need to add any chocolate to them but you can if you like – just melt a few pieces of 80% and then spread in a paper thin layer over the finished bars before chilling. These bars are ideal with a coffee in the morning, you can eat them with one hand as you nurse/type/push the pram and i promise they dont lead to any sugar spikes…Im off to lie down for 10minutes and to pat myself on the back briefly.

ps – i took some beautiful photos of these bars but nothing with upload properly so bare with me and I promise more shots will appear soon x

Ingredients
200g dates destoned
60g almond (or peanut or sunflower) butter
80g honey (or maple syrup)
110g chopped nuts and/or dried fruit
140g oats

Method
Line an 8x8inch baking dish or tray
Place the almond butter and the honey into a pan
Place the dates into a food processor with a splash of warm water and process for 5-7 minutes until they broken down and dough like
Place the dates and oats and chopped nuts/fruit into a large bowl and stir well to combine
Warm the honey and nut butter till they are a smooth sauce
Pour over the oat mixture and stir well
Press into the baking dish and then place into the freezer to set
These will keep sealed in the freezer for at least three months
Remove 5-10 mins before you want to enjoy

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Everyone needs a Cheers

I had the loveliest of mornings today. A little coffee shop has opened a few blocks from our house & it’s perfect. Somehow, in the space of two months Mio has become our “Cheers”. Daniel, the owner, knows our coffee order, he flirts with the old ladies, let’s the babies crawl round & serves phenomenal grilled cheese sandwiches. Lately we have been sneaking there once the baby is at nursery and enjoying a cheeky espresso and a fresh juice. Sometimes its a grab & go, other times it’s like a mini breakfast date with avo on toast & a good old chat with the other regulars.

Behind the bar is stacked high with traditional breads that he buys in from a bakery in Grunwald. BrotZeit makes real bread. Simple, rich, dark sourdoughs with ancient starters. Thick bread studded with walnuts or rolled in sunflower seeds. Bread that cries out for fresh sliced tomatoes and a crunch of salt.

This morning I got to hang out at Mio with friends. We drank coffee, ate bites of freshly baked apple cake & sampled bread. Then I rushed home, fed the baby and made cut myself a doorstep of walnut, chia spelt sourdough. It was slathered with the only butter worth eating (thank you Beillevaire for existing) and topped it with a stray plum tomato. Total perfection!

Building a tribe with feta and spinach bread

They say that it takes a village to raise a child and as this year ticks on, I am beginning to believe them. I guess that it wasn’t that long ago that families lived closer together, that you knew your neighbour, that you had childhood friends down the road. As most of you know we moved to Munich when I was nearing the end of my pregnancy. I ended up two weeks overdue, was induced and after 30hours (with zero progress at all) had an emergency section (the umbilical cord was wrapped multiple times round Mays neck). From the minute May arrived, we needed a tribe and we haven’t stopped needing one since. We needed our freezer filling, our dog walking, our baby to be cooed over. We needed to be taken care of. The few friends that we had here made us feel loved and special but we had only met them weeks before and we weren’t at the stage of being able to let them into a crazy house, in three day old clothes stained with milk leakage. We needed people that knew us. People that knew our normal and could read between the lines. We needed friends that knew our history, that knew how to ask the difficult questions and who would ship us off to bed when we needed it. This year has been the very very best of years. We have watched in wonder as our little daughter grows and learns. But it has also been the hardest of years. Doing something so life changing as becoming parents meant that we needed the support of loved ones around us and on top of that, the husband has struggled this year with depression. He has found moving here harder than me in many ways. He has struggled with the culture shock of the land and of becoming a dad. I have spent the last 13months trying to keep his head above water whilst being the best mum I can be and when there is just the two of you, everything is felt more intensely. I think that why this year more than ever, cooking has mattered. It has been my respite, my solace. It is the little bit of me that I can cling on to. On days where words haven’t hit the spot the action of putting down a bowlful of something delicious has been my way of showing love. Serving homemade cakes to friends has bought us closer. Taking freshly made goodies to playgroup allowed me to open up and chat round the language barrier.

Today I dropped May off at nursery and then met a old friend for coffee. We greeted the owner by name, we sipped espresso and we laughed. It felt homely. I realised that somewhere along the way, we have been building a tribe here. That despite the hard days, the days where I was sure I was failing everyone, it turns out we were doing something right. I came home wanting to cook. I was wet and cold from the weather and I needed the oven to on and to break bread. So as Cold Feet played in the background I measured out this loaf. It is silky rich when baked and souffle light. It is salty from the feta and earthy from the spinach and it needs that tiny hint of chilli warmth. It would be delicious toasted along side a bowl of ratatouille, dipped in roasted tomato soup or topped with a crunchy carrot and seed salad.

Happy Tuesday x

Ingredients
Large handful of fresh spinach chopped
2 eggs
200g – 250g flour
1 tsp baking powder
0.5 tsp dried chilli flakes
1.5 tbsp ricotta
40g feta crumbled
1.5 tbsp rapeseed oil

Method
Preheat your oven to 170C
Grease a loaf tin
Whisk the eggs in a large bowl
Stir in the ricotta, crumbled feta, chilli, oil and spinach
Fold in the flour and baking powder – use as much flour as you need to reach a thick batter
Pour into the loaf tin and bake for 50-60mins or until a skewer comes out clean and it is golden brown

 

 

I like…breakfast donuts

This morning I text two of my favourite ladies. I needed advice, on the important matters of jeans and makeup. I don’t have a beauty regime, unless you count washing your face with water in the shower and the months of no sleep are starting to show. Also, now that the baby is less sticky/sicky I fancy looking a little more polished and brighter. One of my girlfriends wrote back ‘with your cheekbones and bod I would wander round naked with no make up at all’. What a phenomenally uplifting thing to say. Seriously, that compliment was greater than any makeup I could buy. I feel so good and it made me realise that we are so quick to critisize ourselves and to highlight our faults and flaws. I don’t ever stop to think ‘wow look at my cheekbones’ but I could tell you all the quirks that I would like to airbrush out. Wouldn’t it be nice to just state what we love about ourselves.

So I thought I would kick it off. I love that I am punctual. If you need me to be somewhere at a certain time, I will be there. In reality I will be there early and be awkwardly standing around trying to not look too early and keen. I am good at feeding people. I know this might sound silly, but I love to make big platters and bowls of food and watch everyone tuck in. I love that food opens up conversation and makes everyone feel a little warmer and rosier. I don’t find it stressful to make tons of food or bake cakes and can happily host a spontaneous dinner party. Finally I am hardy. If you need IKEA furniture building, your house packing up, a shop opening, cement pouring, or a harvest of apples picked..count me in. I can happily toil away for days on end as long as I am caffeinated and occasionally fed.

It turns out that I am also pretty good at baking donuts. These little beauties are breakfast donuts because they are packed with apples and carrots, chia and oats. They are topped with honey and bee pollen. They are shaped perfectly for on the go with a coffee in hand as you cycle to work (this may be illegal so maybe don’t do this!). I promise you, you will like yourself a little more if you make them and if you share them then others will like you more too!

Ingredients (makes 9)
125g instant oats
125g flour
1 tsp baking powder
4 tbsp stewed apple
1 grated carrot
1 tbsp chia seeds
1 tbsp chopped dried fruit
3 tbsp rapeseed oil
1 egg (or 1 flax egg)

2 tbsp honey
1 tbsp bee pollen

Method
Preheat your oven to 160C
Place the egg, oil, carrot, apple and chia into a large bowl and whisk together
Sift in the dry ingredients and the oats and fold together
Spoon into a well greased donut pan
Bake until golden brown (approx 12-15mins)
Turn out immediately onto a cooling rack
Whilst still warm brush with honey, wait 1 minute and brush again
Sprinkle with bee pollen and leave to cool

Three ingredient chocolate mug cake

What is it about mugs that make them cosy? Some of my favourite things are served from a mug: coffee, tomato soup, hot toddy…and now this cake!!!! I made a cake, in 3 minutes, with three ingredients. This is one of those total potluck moments, I wanted to have a little experiment and the cake angels made that experiment pay off. The other thing is that this cake contains an egg & everyone says that you should eat eggs for breakfast so I say you should eat this cake for breakfast!

I wasn’t going to post a recipe today but I had to share this one because its too fun not to try. Its deliciously soft and fluffy. Not quite a cake texture, not quite a pudding. I would imagine it is similar to a souffle…but I have to admit to never having tried one. Its just a yummy little chocolatey moment. You could add in a splash of coffee, top with blueberry chia jam, add in grated apple. Have fun & get your mug on x

Ingredients
1 egg
1 banana
2 tsp cocoa

Method
Place the three ingredients into a blender
Mix quickly and then pour into a mug leaving a little room at the top for expansion
Microwave for 3 minutes checking every minute
Dust with cocoa & enjoy